Sunday, October 20, 2013

Bad times

As everyone knows, October and Halloween is my favorite time of year.  I've been trying to work up the motivation to write an appropriately Halloweenish post, but it hasn't happened.  For weeks I've been struggling with some pretty severe depression.  I'm normally rather resistant to such things, I'm generally upbeat, or at least emotionally stable.  But this has hit me hard, and I'm all kinds of messed up.  I feel like I'm going crazy.  I'll have some average days and then out of the blue it'll hit me and I can't stop crying or tearing myself apart.  I don't think I'm likely to go into much detail, as I don't really like to put too personal of stuff out in a public forum, and also I like my blog to be a happy place that I enjoy looking back through from time to time.  But, I don't know, I'm feeling very very hopeless.  Shattered dreams and all that jazz.  I write stories, but I'm just not seeing any happy endings for myself right now.  Rationally, I realize that depression and grief are fleeting things and that eventually things will go back more or less to normal.  But at the moment it's all very bleak and frightening, and I just don't know what to do.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would like to write to you and would just like to confirm that you are using your aol email address before I do so.

EvilDolly said...

Well yes I do still use the contact info listed on my site.

Anonymous said...

I hope things get better for you, and I will say I wish you well in this and all future endeavors

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry to hear that you're going through a difficult time. I want to say that I really appreciate everything you've given us. Your stories are wonderful. I hope you get better, and soon. Please know that you are in my thoughts, and that you have my good wished.

{{{{Evil Dolley}}}}


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Anonymous said...

It's tough, isn't it? Why does it come and when will it leave? I hate how debilitating it can be and how even having someone to blame doesn't even help.

I hope you find lasting peace, someday, someway.